Week 20?

Wei! I don't have a lot of time, and not much happened this week, so peace! Remember to eat your vegetables and laugh often!

Here's a comic to delight your fancies!

Christmas week

No email this week because Elder MK got to Skype with the fam on Christmas!!
So great to hear/see him!! He spoke great Spanish, we were shocked to hear how fast he can speak it.  Way to go MK! We all love you!

Picture-mania!

Elder MKzing Jones, Elder Thibault, and groupie. :)

Holy Guacamole! This is serious stuff!!

Missionaries need some serious "selfie" practice. Elder Thibault

What?! Not every mission is a tropical paradise??

Members of our ward. That pic was taken atop an empty building in La Cuchilla!

They're in the Zone...

Santo Domingo Temple and the Nativity

Seventeen is A Teenage Dream! ...For Some, Anyway!

Grrreetings, Chespians! (Only members of C2H2 will understand such a name.)

Oh, how the days are like hours and the hours are like minutes! Many of you have heard the Missionary Cliché that "the time just flies by" or something like that (it took everything in my power to refrain from writing that in Spanish). The truth of the matter is, it does. This is due of course in part to the Mortal's concept of temporality, in which case the Present takes up a large and difinitive form. However, when applied to an external Four-Dimensional examination, the current moment in which we exist is literally nothing, and by such virtually impossible to pinpoint (like trying to skewer a gnat with a pin from 127 feet away in the middle of a hurricane). When the mind has less reference points to hold on to (or rather, more definitive recent memories to shape the past), or perception of temporality slows, hence causing the present to balloon in size. However, when more unique marks of passing temporality are applied, the conciousness becomes more streamlined, thus causing time to appear to have moved (or be moving) faster. Man, I am feeling GREAT today!

This last week has been a bucketload of traveling (insomuch that all of our funds dried up...we had to start living off of Personal Money for a few days [it's all good though; our reembursal is going to be HUGE!]). We'd a Christmas Conference this past Tuesday, in which half of the missionaries of this mission gathered together for a day of glory and celebration. While conversing with some of the Spanish Speaking Missionaries, I realized a bit of a humorsome fact: I can indeed speak/understand spanish extremly well. The problem is, I'm not yet fluent in Dominican. ;D

And then there were some random District/Zone meetings mixed in there...ah! But this last Friday, we'd the opportunity to take an investigating family to Santo Domingo for a Christmas Concert (that sounds weird in English). The music itself was beautiful, and the Spirit was even more so!

Ah, and at the aforementioned event, President Nuckols (the President of our Mission) told Elder Thibault and me that there's still a lack of Elders...so he and I are going to remain solo in Villa for six more weeks. Not too bad though, as Elder Thibault and I get along really well, and the house is more peaceful as a Two-Man. ...Except in the mornings, where we excersize like mad. :D

AH! And most recently! Earlier today, we popped down to Santo Domingo (just an hour and a half away) to see the Doctor Regan (the Doctor for the missionaries) with regards to an Ingrown Toenail that was trying to sneak into my fortress. All was resolved extremly quickly, so we walked around the Temple a bit, then ate at Pizza Hut...which was frankly bizzare. I kept having to remind myself I was in the DR.

Oh, and a new agenda! WITH A COVER DESIGNED BY YOURS TRUELY.

Feliz Nuevo Semana!
-Elder Jones

16! Which, According to The Age Old Song, Rhymes With "Kitchen"!

"And there shall be days in which the words of the Madmen shall descend once more to the Valleys, and there shall be great rejoicing mingled with nerdy references." -Author Unknown

Another week tucked away! And a bit of a painful one at that, I might add! But, before we go into the deep emotional stories, let us look across some of the smaller, but still equally beautiful ones.

We made guacamole. It was good. Enserio (seriously).

An old Jentzsch Family Tradition was brought to the DR, and shared gloriously with my companion. For those of you who are unfamiliar with such, it is known as "St. Nick's Day". I'd deeply explain the emotional roots behind it...but I'm a missionary, so time is a sauce I left back home. :D
Also, I'd send a picture...but my computer refuses to do such. Huh.

AND NOW, TO THE PAIN! (Princess Bride Reference)

I've continued with my impossible quest to shed all traces of fat from this noodley body of mine, and because of such have endured great trials and tribulation (known in the common tongue as "soreness"). But hey, when I get back, I'm gonna look GREAT! *Dorky Double-Fist-Pump, moonwalks away*

There is once thing that should be avoided at all costs in the DR, known by the deceivingly delicious name: Pan de Fruta (be not deceived, as it is nither bread nor fruit). So apparently, if you're not Dominican, this weird nut thing can play weird tricks on your stomach. Namely, (extremly squemish people, close your eyes now) you will lose fluid from one or both ends. Elder Thibault was up half the night vomiting, whereas I stuck it lucky and only had to endure a couple painful bouts with Diarea. The worst part is, the flavor of the demon nut thing wasn't even that good. Really bland, actually. ...Disappointing.

And now, I would like to slip in a quick note: Mom, don't worry, I'm fine.
I got hit by a motorcycle.
We were heading to an appointment, when we crossed a road. There were two motors heading towards us, the closer of the aforementioned moving to pass behind us. The latter, however, decided to try to go in front of us (the direction we were walking). Unconcerned, we steped back to let him pass...but I suppose he realized how foolish his current direction was, for as we steped back, he moved to go behind us. Still unconcerned, Elder Thibault and I froze, waiting for him to make a decision and go. However, the driver was not the most desisive of chaps, and simply swerved back and forth, trying to pick a side...until he slammed into me.
Elder Thibault grabbed onto my arm, preventing me from falling (which would have made matters worse), and the driver immediate began apologizing profusely, telling us that his brakes weren't working (looking back, it's slightly funny, as I made a fairly effective brake). So, once my head stopped spinning, I did the most logical thing anyone just hit by a speeding motor would do.
I told him that we were Missionaries from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, and that we'd love to share our message with him some time. :D
I felt kind of bad for him, as he kept freaking the crap out, and we just stood there laughing at how funny of a story this was going to be. We gave him a Pass-Along Card with our names and number on it, and told him that if he ever wanted to hear more about our message, we'd love to share with him.
Man, I wonder what that guy was thinking afterwards...
Anyway, so I walked away basically unscratched, just slightly dizzy from the shock of what just happened, and with a small bruise. According to Elder Thibault, just before it hit me, I jumped a bit, which somehow took away most of the impact. ...I don't remember actually doing anything, but hey! It worked! SECRET NINJA POWERS!
(Mom, stop worrying, I'm fine.)

In other news, we're working to establish a Branch! If you remeber the Miracle that happened the first time we got trapped in La Cuchilla, the same guy that helped us out is similarly now helping us (meaning the Ward) in this regard! (Freaking double pronged miracle!)

Paz y Buena Voluntad!
-Elder Jones

A few more pictures

Selfie!! Elder MKzing Jones and Elder Thibault

Yoda and Captain Moroni... Perfect team!

Clothesline in a tropical sunset. :)

Numero 15! Much Like The New Year We're About To Break Into!

Wei wei wei, my fellow Nerdlings!

I am currently in agonizing pain! Yes, it is breathtakingly true! I've recently contracted an incredibly painful disease, which makes it difficult to walk. Though known by different names across the world, in English, it is called: The Side-Effects of Excersizing Effectivly. ;P About two days ago, I went against the pleadings of the chubs on my body, and accompanied Elder Thibault in a round of "Insanity" workouts, which were all conviniently packed together in a DVD. Now, normally I've a mixed bag of emotions with regards to Workout Videos (frankly, I've a really hard time not laughing when I watch them), but I will say one thing. They WORK. And hurt. Yeah, so here I am, two days later, with sore thighs/calves. It's a good thing my job doesn't involve walking all day, right? It's a good thing that Villa Altagracia isn't just covered in hills, right?
Note the sarcasm dripping off those last two sentences. ;D
WE PRESS FORWARD, HOWEVER! Haha!

Let's see...stories of glories...hmm...(stalling)...what to write...

Thanksgiving! My first Thanksgiving away from my family/country! However, Elder Thibault and I are no mere mortal men (we're missionaries, foo!), so utilizing our awesome dorky powers, we crafted a beautiful Thanksgiving lunch!

Most of what you see it made from scratch, with the exception of the chips, chicken, and sparkling apple cider (which we verified with the cashier about fifty times to make sure it was alcohol-free). ...Okay, so the Brownies were only about halfway homemade (we bought the mix and added peanut butter), but hey, we MADE it at HOME. That should count, right? And the Salsa...my gravy boat...SO FLIPPING GOOD! They don't have salsa in this country (or anything even remotely spicy), so I decided to defy the system and make my own! FIGHT THE SYSTEM! (That one's for you, Elder Valenzuela!)

Speaking of food, one of the most confusing things about the DR is its prime restaurant chain. They're called Pica Pollo and are catagorically chinese food...as long as your definition of "chinese" is fried-chicken and fries. ...I still don't understand. They're all chinese themed, run by chinese people, and claim to have chinese food...but are really more like KFC's with paper lanterns and random fried rice!
We'd also a beautiful lesson with the mother of a family, who shows extreme interest in our message. She's already recognized the Spirit testifying that our message is true, and agreed to, with her husband, pray to know for certain if it's true. ...I can't really put how glorious the lesson was into words! Just beautiful... ​

And a comic to spice things up! (Like my Salsa!)
Paz mis amigos!
-Elder Jones

Fourteen! Woo! Insert Clever Number Pun Here!

Time is a rather fickle flapping falcon. It comes and it goes, building momentum as we bathe within it. Now take ten minutes to think about that. Preferable out of a bus window (best philosophy school EVER!).

Speaking of philosophy, I've come to learn that one of the best ways to let the ideas flow is to scrub a few plates with soap. As we lack dishwashers here, all of the washing is done by hand, which in reality is a beautiful blessing in disguise. In this sudd-soacked pocket of time, one can dream freely, unraveling the mysteries of difficulties and the depths of eternity. And then we have clean dishes, so that's a bonus! :D

The females here are becoming more and more apparent in attaining their ultamate goal. Just a few days ago, a girl shouted after us, "Mi VISA!"
...Well, at least she's honest!

Deluge! We'd another serious of storms hit our area, one of which took the life of my Missionary Daily Planner. WHY CRUEL FATE?! ;D

Oh! Right! We got attacked this week! ...By laughter! (Made you jump.)

Elder Thibault was cooking lunch, while I equalized the time by washing dishes. As I turned to put a plate away, water flew off into the hot oiled pan that Elder Thibault was holding...which apparently makes fire. A freaking benemoth column of heavenly flame burst forth like a culinary gyser of fire, causing our lungs to quickly deflate as their contents beat upon our voice boxes.

...We screamed a little bit. But it wasn't like a noprmal scream! I've no idea why, but we both screamed like two octaves low. Afterward, I laughed hysterically for the next ten to fifteen minutes.

One misconception that I would like to sweep away about missionary service: it is in no way a simple walk in the park. Sacrificing everything for two years of your life (including family, friends, plans, jobs, opportunities, hobbies, school, and essentially yourself) is one of the most challenging things you will ever do in your youth, quite possibly even your entire life (I wouldn't know for certain; I've only come this far down my road). There will be times where you'll feel as though you just want to collapse to your knees and weep until the tears stop flowing. These past fourteen weeks alone, I've been hit from almost every angle, my soul bruised and burned from the bouts with sorrow, discouragement, and anxiety.

A rational person at this point would ask, "Why on earth would you volunteer for something like this?"

The answer is simple, but ultimatly profound: I KNOW IT'S TRUE. And if my sacrifice can bring others to this same knowelege, this same happiness, then I'd be a wicked man to refrain from such. The only reason we can even give such a service in the first place came about because of the Greatest Sacrifice of All. Is this then foolishness to desire to give a sliver of my time and a portion of my pain to the one who gave his entire life and the entirety of his agony so that I might live?

The most fundamental piece of this Church is sacrifice. The irony, however, is that when we give to The Lord, he returns to us One-Hundered-Fold.

Speaking of returns, we'd a miracle strike our chapel this week! Elder Thibault and I have been struggling to get our investigators to church these past several...umm...forevers. Saturday, we mutually decided to turn to a higher power to aid our quest. Thus began the fast!

...AND IT WORKED WONDERS!!! Keep in mind that Dominicans are kind of horrible when it comes to keeping commitments, ESPECIALLY when it comes to coming to church. The most I have ever seen with regards to investagators atending has been two. This Sunday, however, we had TEN investigators show, AND FIVE Less-Active Members attend! FREAKING GLORIOUS! I literally had to use all of my might to refrain from screaming for joy.

The Lord is indeed refining me. When I return to your embraces, I will truly be indefinetly greater than I could have ever aspired to be on my own. (And I'll be Bilingual!)

Peace, Love, Unity, Serenity!

-Elder MK Jones

(Oh, and your homework for this next week is to email something related to Thanksgiving. It's fairly open ended, so go for it!)

:D

Lucky Number 13!

Mark off your calenders, because another week of glory has passed beyond our temporal perspective! I'd a bit of a wacky realization the other day, as I suddenly realized I'm over 1/8th of the way through my mission. ...IT'S WACKY!

I've been a bit of a rebel this past week, doing things I know my mother would never approve of. For example, riding in a car without a seatbelt (as well as riding with seven people in a five seater car [that's Dominican Public Transport for you!]), running across a highway to catch a transport back to Villa Altagracia, and hitchhiking to similarly get back to Villa (this being a seperate situation than the second mentioned). Woo!

But first, A MIRACLE! Last week, we were in a new area, known as "La Cuchilla" (no one seems to know why), in which we've been having huge success. However, the church member who normally gives us a ride was busy that day, so we'd to rely on public transport to get us there and back. However, all public transport ceases at 6PM, so we'd only a pinch of time to our preachy alotment. Like determined Soldiers of God, we got back at 5:50PM...only to be told by a bystander that all of the transports were gone. Stunned, we thanked the man, and began to walk, trying to think of a way to get back home. After a moment, w decided to pray, and put matters in Holier hands. It was not five minutes after we finished that we heard someone shout "Elders!". As we turned, we saw a man walking towards us, who introduced himself as Brother Nobles (in perfect English, no less), and that he's been looking for Missionaries from Villa Altagracia so as to find out what time we have church on Sundays (as where he lives is technically within our Ward boundries, despite it being 30 minutes away). He then gave us a ride back to Villa, and we spoke all the while. He's been a member for 45 years (and counting), picked up English when he lived in the States for a huge chunk of his life, then came back to the Dominican Republic to retire. This actually serves as a double blessing, as if we start up a church Branch out there (and we very well might), we know where to find one member! Haha! Glorious!

The closest thing to a Frecca Story I have: as we were walking to a lesson, a group of three girls walked towards us. As our two parties neared their crossing point, one of the three split from the group to walk towards me, and began doing a robot walk. Yes, you're reading that right. She literally began walking like a robot towards me. ...You know, sometimes, I don't even know... :D

Hitchhiking! Once again, while trying to get out of La Cuchilla (our phone had no service and we couldn't get ahold of our ride), we walked for 30 minutes to no avail, shaking our thumbs at those who passed all the while. After a time, a red semi passed by, we shook our thumbs...and it kept going around the bend. Elder Thibault shook his head, and said, "I didn't think that one would have stopped anyway. As we rounded the corner...it was stopped. :D
The driver gave us a ride back to Villa, and we thanked him magnimoniously for assisting us.

And now, here's a comic to spice up your week!

Peace, Love, Unity, Serenity!

-Elder Jones

Move Over Peter Capaldi, There's a More Important 12 at The Mo!

Ah, that's one thing I miss: being able to make a Doctor Who reference and get at least one grin of comprehension. Entonces!

It's Monday, Monday, gotta write everyone on Monday... 

The land is ours now! Last Tuesday, the other two Elders flew away from Villa Altagracia, leaving 2.5 areas for Elder Thibault and I to juggle. AND IT'S GLORIOUS. We've been teaching so many people! We actually are doing kind of poorly with regards to contacting, as we normally have to move ubber quickly between our appointments! (We're trying to fix the lack of contacting problem, but still!)

Well, I suppose the first place to start is to establish very firmly that "Bible-Bashing" is a weapon that should not be wielded by a Missionary. This past Tuesday (I have to remind myself what the days are called in English), we had an appointment with a fellow, but to our dismay, when we arrived, we learned that he wasn't home. His wife, however, showed interest in our message, so we began to teach her. The lesson was incredibly powerful, and the Spirit was indeed present...up until when the guy we had an appointment with walked in. Almost automatically, he picked up a freaking gigantic stack of his Church's magazines, and initiated the Faith War. He ranted for a while (a loooonng while) about the condition of the spirit after death, and how it becomes as nothing upon it's separation from the body. When he paused for breath, I asked, "So, what is the meaning of life?" He was a bit taken aback, and said that we need to do good things in this life to help others, to which I replied, "But if there's nothing after death, why does it matter? Eventually, we all will die, and if we become nothing, then why does this life matter?" He began to ramble again, and hastily changed the subject.

Here's the thing: debates do not change people. Only the Spirit can ignite that change. From my experiences, debates only set both sides more firmly in their opinion. Now, don't get me wrong, I do enjoy a mentally stimulating debate here and there, but with regards to the Gospel of Jesus Christ, it's a no-go zone. If you're just trying to prove someone wrong/yourself right, the heart becomes as stone. But when people see that you truly do love and care about them, and that you want them to feel the happiness that you've called your friend for so long...well, that's where the heart is truly touched.

Again, I do not have a Frecca Story! I was not attacked by flirty girls. However! I was attacked by a swarm of Mormon children earlier today. One jumped on my back, the others pulled on my arms, and I was forced to my knees. I hobbled around, making absurd noises and laugh-screaming, and more kids took notice. They just kept pouring and pouring upon me...eventually, I ended up in a fetal position on the floor, with a mountain of niños piled atop me. :D
Little Mormons kind of adore the Elders. We're like superheros. BUT BETTER.

We've an investigator who's been really stuck progression-wise, and she finally confessed to us that she's been really confused by the stuff about the LDS Church she's seen online (DK Anti-Mormon). She then showed us the video, and I had to fight super hard not to laugh. It kept going on and on and on about points that literally had NOTHING to do with what we believe. (Like how apparently we believe that Adam was resurrected to make a baby with Mary, and that's where Jesus comes from. ...Where on earth did you vomit that out of?) We told her to write a list of her questions, and that in our next visit, we would answer all of them out of the scriptures. He then pointed out that if she really wanted to know stuff, she could and should just ask us. We do believe in living "Thou shalt not bear false witness", and would answer any and all of her questions to the best of our abilities.

But then that got me thinking: we are a bunch of barely just Adults, out teaching in a totally different land, and then asking those we teach to ASK GOD if the things we teach are true. Even if I didn't have the Testimony of this Gospel that I do have, the faith that the LDS Church has in a bunch of barely post-adolecents to spread this Gospel AND likewise the faith that God HIMSELF will confirm that what they teach is true would kind of make me wonder if what they're teaching could perhaps indeed be the true Word of God.

To all of you out there going through hard times, I want you to know that God does care. I've heard lately of challenges that a significant amount of you are currently passing through, and really, I just want to take each one of you into my arms, to let you know that all truly will be alright. Well, since I can't do that, I suppose my words will have to be the balm in this instance.

God answers prayers. I can personally testify of this. There've been many instances in my life in which I've felt lost and indeed, quite alone. There have been patches in my life where I've stumbled, and others where I've fallen. Once, in fact, before most of you knew me, I fell into one of the deepest and most bitter pits I've ever dug.

I've heard the cry quite frequently, "why does God let bad things happen to good people?" As one who has passed through darkness, I will tell you rather simply: it is to understand the light. Yes, we will struggle, and at times, we will fall. But it is in these moments of struggle that we become stronger. Indeed, if it were not for the days of difficulty, I would not be who I am. How many of you wonder why I'm so happy? It's because of the challenges I've passed through. So, to clarify a bit: why does God let bad things happen to good people? Because it makes us stronger.

I testify in the name of Him who I serve, that if we turn to Him, we will receive the strength to overcome. I've noted a few friends of mine who have done this same act, called upon God, and indeed received the strength to overcome. You will make it. You are beautiful Sons and Daughters of our Heavenly Father, and you've come too far to back down now. He will aid us through all, if we just trust in Him.

Keep Your Flames Burning Bright!
-Elder Jones,
Master of Inspiration, Encouragement, and Popcorn Making.
(I've been making a lot of Popcorn this past week.)

Insanity Just Got Bumped Up to An 11

Greetings Nerds of all ages! The time has come for you to once again remember that weirdo who left to a foreign country for two years! WOO!!

Alright, there's a twist this time: I've not a single story regarding freaky Dominican Girls. Weird, I know, but there's not such this week. I'm so sorry. :D

Big big changes these next six weeks! The city I'm in, Villa Altagracia, normally consists of two areas, the north and the south, and because of such is shared by two sets of missionaries. This transfer (period of six weeks), the two areas are getting merged into a single baked cookie, of which Elder Thibault and I alone have to devour. In time (hopefully next transfer), two other missionaries will be sent here, the city will be divided again, and it'll be our solemn duty to teach them the ways of Villa Altagracia. ...So, even after I get a new companion, Elder Thibault and I will still be living in the same house. Wack!

And now for a well-baked (and slightly random) story. We often pass by this bakery on our way to a certain part of town. Fortunatly for me, I happen to have a very close relationship with bread, and decided one day to buy a bit. However, as I still wear the Gringo crown, it is at times difficult to fully follow the Spanish soaked conversations, so I occasionally just nod and repeat random words (it works stangely well). Well, I asked for a piece of 25 Peso bread, and she asked me a question that I didn't quite follow. So...I just sort of nodded and said the latter of the two options, not at all knowing what I was buying. ...It was perhaps one of the biggest and most beautiful boulders of bread I've ever seen in my life. Needless to say...well, I rejoiced a bit. :D

Elder Thibault and I have been focusing more on asking Inspired Questions, or rather, following the promptings of the Spirit and saying what the Investigator needs to hear. Such has had beautiful results, as the Spirit has been magnimoniously strong in our lessons, and we've been able to find out what they need to be taught. For example, we were teaching a Less-Active Member of the Church, and after asking an Inspired Question, we learned that the main reason he's not been at Church was because of the lack of support and fellowship he feels from the other Members. Needless to say, we set out to fix such. Miracles all around us!

And Ward Karoake Night! Can't foget that. Elder Thibault and I sang an inspiring ballad of "A Whole New World" from Aladdin (in Spanish, no less). And amigos, a notation for next week! If any of you would like letters from me (it's like the only way I can write replies; I've not a lot of time to email) please reply to this email with your home address. Woot!

Paz!
-Elder Jones

If You Want To See A 10...Well, Just Look At Me. ;P

¿Cómo estáis mis amigos? (¡¡CHANELING ESPAÑA!!)

Entonces! Here´s a weird thought for all of thou to chew on! I´m already 1/10 of the way through my mission. How flipping wack is that?!

And now for your weekly dosage of the Dominicanized Gringo.

Man, have I got a story for you! It´s a very well seasoned story, with the perfect blend of herbs, spices, and perfectly balanced INSANITY.
*Shudders*
Alright, so this story beings with the Elder Thibault and I out contacting, trying to find those who hold interest in our message of the Restored Gospel of Jesus Christ. As we were contacting this one house (in which the older lady inside seemed torn between hiding and coming to talk to us), another lady came out from around the house with her kids, and started talking to us. We asked if we could come back another day and share our message with her, to which she responded yes. ...I'm not sure how it got brought up, but somehow we got talking about how old we are (I already look older than I am, so to a Dominican, I look flipping ANCIENT). When we stated that we were 18 and 19, we heard a delighted shriek (warning sign) from inside. This 18-year old girl comes running out, and reconfirms with us that we're the age that we said we were, then immediatly asks us if we have girlfriends. Before we can answer, however, another girl, the same age, runs out, and asks the exact same question. Elder Thibault responds yes, and (though I honestly wish I could say differently) out of respect for the truth, I'd to respond "no". The two of them kept pestering us about such, until Elder Thibault posed, "Why do you ask?"
"Oh, no reason."
Yeah right.
Anyway, so we took our leave, and returned another day, for our appointment.
As we walked through the door, we both felt immediately that something was off. We weren't sure of how we missed it in our first encounter, but you know how some people simply have crazy written all over their face? Yeah, this lady was drenched in that. She literally had THE Crazy Laugh. So we decided to get out of there ASAP. However, as we went to close, one of the flirty girls from the day before entered, and though I'm not sure why, but we felt safer with her there. So we got through the lesson, all the while this crazy lady keeps randomly talking about these boyfriends she's had. After we finish with a prayer (I'm not sure why, but then we told them the story of the Fruit Stand from 2-3 weeks ago), and we go to shake hands goodbye. As I shake this lady's hand, she clasps on with extreme firmness, and holds such for an extremly long time. Elder Thibault and I laughed, as such was a reference to the story that we just told, but then she kept holding. And kept holding. I'd try to pull away, and she kept holding. Eventually, it got weird, and I sharply pulled my hand out of her grasp. She laughed (*Shudder* crazy laugh) and said that it was just a joke, but there was something in her eyes that I didn't like. We rapidly moved to leave, and as soon as Elder Thibault's back was turned, she slipped a piece of paper into my shirt pocket. Petrified with horror, I could do nothing but hastily power-walk to the door.
As we walked down the front walk, I whispered to Elder Thibault, "Okay, wait until we get far enough away from the house. Wait for it, wait for it..."
He waited for it...
I then turned to him and firmly decreed, "Elder, we are NEVER going back there AGAIN."
"Yeah I know, she was really weird."
"NO. That's not what I mean."
"...What do you mean?"
"As soon as your back was turned, SHE FREAKING SLIPPED A SLIP OF PAPER IN MY POCKET."
"...What?!"
Shuddering with revulsion, I extracted the demon slip to find, scribbed in perfect crazy, name, number, and "Call Me!"
...WHAT THE BACON BITS IS WRONG WITH YOU, FRECCA?! (The Dominican word for an extremly flirty person.) YOU ARE LIKE FOURTY FREAKING YEARS OLD, AND YOU'RE MARRIED!! (Then I remembered she'd said her youngest child had been with someone other than her husband [and that her husband has been in Spain for a really long time] BUT STILL!!)
 ...Needless to say, I cast the crap out of that satan scroll. It's feeding termites nightmares somewhere among a Dominican pile of rubbish.
*Shudder*
To my friends, I say one thing. THANK YOU FOR BEING THE SANE PEOPLE YOU ARE, AND FOR LIKEWISE HAVING SUCH HIGH MORAL STANDARDS.
Man, even the memory makes me feel like I'm going to throw up...*Shudder*

Oh! I tried contacting by myself on a Guagua, set the appointment and eveything...but later realized that I'd forgotten to ask for an address or nmber to contact him by. So...yeah. I'M A GREENIE LANTERN!! WOOSH!

And that's all I've got story-wise. Next week's MKzing email is going to cost you though: I'm expecting ALL OF YOU to send me a clever joke. YOU'VE A WEEK TO COMPLETE SUCH AN ASSIGNMENT.

Paz y amor!
-The Elder Jones

Picture time!

Receiving a package from mom and dad :) Made it there untouched.

MK and comp - Elder Thibault from Eagle, Idaho

MK titles this one - "The Younglings"

The Missionaries of Villa Altagracia - Elder MK, Elder Thibault, Elder Oscal, and Elder Perez

The MTC [namely Cindy Lou Who, Santa, and Rudolph]

Thibault, Perez, and Creepy MK

Living quarters

Baptism of Cinthia. "The missionaries have been teaching her for a time, and the baptism was scheduled for when I came in. I'm such an awesome missionary, people get baptized without my having to teach them! ;D" - MK

9! Like The Movie! BUT BETTER! (Only by a little.)

"Bouncing in at number 9, here he comes, it's ELDER JONES!!!!"
*Crowd applauding and screaming like mad*
...What, overkill? Okay okay, I realize that introduction was kind of lame, but it's already been typed! There's no way to take it back now...(and feel free to point out the "Backspace" key; I'll take it into consideration a week from now. ;P )

*Grampy Voice* Entonces! Let's crack down on that which it yet to be told, shall we?

Well well well! We're ever popular here with the ladies (it's kind of scary)! As Elder Tibault and I were skipping merrily (slight exaggeration) to our next appointment, a large group of girls (about 17-ish I think) shouted after us, asking us in English where we were from (that's like one of the three things people here know how to say in English. The other two are "Hi, how are you my friend?", and...well, something rather impolite). We answered, and they immedietly asked if they could take a picture (note the singular) with us. Elder Thibault seemed stunned (not sure why), and before he could form a reply, my mouth had automatically formed the word "Claro" ("sure"). Suddenly, we were being swarmed by these girls who wanted to snap a stillshot with the two pasty foreigners (what's wrong with chu? Ain't you never seen a white guy before? [one of my favorite things to say to Elder Thibault whenever people gwak at us]). As they piled up around us, my missionary instincts kicked in, and I moved quickly to make sure that my companion and I were not seperated amidst this Feminine Flood. What I didn't process, however, was that in my Elderly fear, I'd grabbed on to the arm of Elder Thibault to prevent our seperation. As soon as the psynapses in my bain finally...well..."snapped" together, I slipped my arm away (we don't need to be giving people any more reasons to think we're weird ;P ).
Somehow, neither the girls nor Elder Thibault took any notice. :D
Anyway! So then they started doing individual pics with us, which was when Elder Thibault rgained his ability to speak and told them that this was the final pic. So the girl walks up, and the rest are telling us that it's her birthday. Awkwardly, Elder Thibault responds, "...Congratulations?"
We were then told to hug her, to which we rapidly replied that we could not. Then we booked it! Woo!

This last Saturday, we had the privilege of being able to go to the Temple, so as to accompany our Ward Mission Leader (Jason) and his wife (yes, actually married for realsies) for their family's Sealing (including their two little daughters). Awesome opportunity! And, as a heap of whipped cream atop this pumpkin pie, I was able to see some people from the Missionary Training Center, both teachers (Hola, Hermano Nuñez!) and other missionaries (Paz, Hermana Twiner!). And the best part is, we got to go just before the next group left! *Shuffles in place to The PianoGuys*

Haircuts! I shet my first blades of hair here upon Dominican soil. It is indeed glorious...but I rather miss my old strands. *Hair whip, realizes such isn't possible, weeps* It's better than Elder Thibault's, though. He was trying to cut his own hair (and he would have mostly succeeded), but when he asked another Elder for some help with such, a slight mistake was made, and too much was shaved off on the back. ...That, and it kind of looked like he was pulling off a serious Foehawk, due to the length of the hair atop his head. He later had to get some assistance from a Barber in putting it right. :D

I received my first package! GLORIOUS! Like mana from Heaven...except in several different flavors! The box itself came with several pictures of Jesus on it, as doing such almosy garentees that it will NOT get stolen. Does such actually work? Beats me, but it did for mine! :D

And last note, I'm struggling with one tiny little thing. It's not really a big deal, but...MY SISTER IS NOW TWELVE!!! WHAT HAPPENED?! THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG HERE! :D It's wacky how fast the time goes! I've not really processed that I've been gone more than two months!

The Lord continues to bless us! Things are spectacular here! Yeah, we have our days where we come home after a day fraught with rejection, and our feet feel as though they're about to fall off, but it is in these moments of trial that we come to truly appreciate all that our Savior did for us, all that he went through for us to be free. It's in these moments that we indeed feel closest with our Redeemer.

Paz y Amor to all y'alls! Allonz-Y!
-Elder Jones

8 is as Great as a Plate of Chocolate Cake!

*Trips into frame, dripping with sweat, panting* Sorry I'm late! Things kind of got crazy this week, and in the crossfire, my email time got snipped. However, thanks to a generous Mission President, I've been granted time to speak now! Huzzah!

I will be totally honest when I say that this has been perhaps the strangest week of my mission thus far (as well as the most difficult). But all things have their purpose, and I am filled with the faith that these things shall indeed "be for my good".

Well! We've done a bucketload of walking, insomuch that my legs are indeed quite sore (I plan to be a calf model when I return home). In one of these daily jaunts, we passed by a stand heavy laden with fruit. Next to such were seated two girls, both of which I'd estimate to be about 13 or so (it's impossible to tell how old Dominicans are; I'm convinced that the Fountain of Youth really is on this island after all). Curse my gorgeous face, for as we passed, one of the girls grabbed onto my wrist, with a firmness of grasp that surpassed that of most mortals. Now, keep in mind that I'm still a bit of a Greenbean, and more often than not have no idea what people are saying to me. She said something, and honestly, in my noviceness to the missionary work, I honestly thought she wanted to know more about the Restored Gospel of Jesus Christ (I'M SUCH A GREENIE!). In all of this gringo confusion, Elder Thibault continued walking, as the event had yet to catch his notice. I'll admit, panic rose like bile to the surface, and with a bit of a shaky voice, I shouted, "ELDER! ELDER! ELDER THIBAULT!!"

He turned, and with a bit of a knowing smile, came to my rescue. They had a bit of a conversation (which I didn't understand any of in the moment [I later asked Elder Thibault what went down]) which went more or less as follows:

(Him) "Alright, let him go."
(Her) "No! I'm in love with him!"
"Great, but just because you're in love with him doesn't mean you have to keep ahold of him!"
"No! I'm going to steal him from you!"
"No, you CANNOT steal my companion!"
"I'm in love with him!"
"Let him go!"
And she eventually did.

Also, that same day, when we were contacting, a random guy ran by, screaming "BLEEEEEAAAAAAAUUUUUUGGHHHHHHH!!!"

Speaking of crazy drunk people, while we were out walking another day, we walked past a bar, which was pumping rather loud (Dominican loud, mind you, which is about five times louder than American loud) music. Immediately, this guy with totally bloodshot eyes stands up, walks over, and says something. He repeated his words several times, but due to the volume of the music (and the fact that he was basically whispering), it was impossible to discern what he was trying to say. He then went to shake our hands, but instead of a normal "palm-to-palm up-and-down release-hands" type of deal, as soon as our hands make contact, he rolls his hand away, does a bunch of weird finger wiggles, then waves three fingers in our faces (and for me, he added a delightful stomach poke). As we went to leave, he tried to pull us into a big hug. ...It twas at this point that Elder Thibault put the hammer down and forced the guy off of us. So, he goes to shake our hands farewell...and...more finger-wiggle three-finger-shake-shake-in-our-faces. Wack.

Then another day, we were walking to one of our appointments, when we saw a guy sitting on the ground, leaning up against a fence with his eyes closed, twitching. Before we even have time to process what we're seeing, this old lady with an umbrella just as plain as day walks calmly across the road, raises a hand over him, and starts trying to "cast the devil out of him". ...After about five minutes, we suddenly realized: WHO DOES THAT?! (We saw him about 45 minutes later by the way, and he was just then getting up from where he sat. He later proceeded to hobble away with a bit of oddity in his step. ...Something tells me there was less of a devil and more of a disability flowing here. Just a thought. :D )

And RAIN! So much rain...the streets became rivers, and the staircases became waterfalls. SO BEAUTIFUL!!! As we were helping some people move pipe that had fallen into the road and was messing up traffic, I stepped on a patch of what I thought was normal ground and collapsed in the street. Yeah, the gutters were so full to overflowing, that they were indistinguishable from the rest of the road! :D

And finally, I was hit with a bit of a sickness. It's nothing bad, but makes work a tad more challenging! Haha! Brilliant! I was tired of it being easy! ;D

The Spirit has helped me grow so much this week. And, I've got great stories to tell! Woo!

Joke of The Week: Why couldn't the bicycle stand up on its own? It was too tired. ...WOO! Lame jokes!

Paz, Amor, Unidad, y Tranquilidad!
-Elder Jones

8 1/2 weeks!! Wow!

Hola! All is well! I got kind of caught up in stuff this week, hence explaining my lateness/lack of a weekly email! (I'm really squished for time!) I'll see if I can write more tomorrow (no promises) but I just wanted to make sure you didn't freak out at my lack of a reply!

-Elder Mic-Cray-Cray

The Most Magical Number of All! (7, For Those of You Not Paying Attention)

Jiggly-Jumbo-Jello, it's time to say HELLO!

The weeks have indeed begun to increase in their speed. A wise man once said: "The MTC is the longest part of the mission, the first six weeks in the field are the hardest part, but after that, it all just sort of blurs by." (That may or may not have been me just catolouging what others have said. Heh heh.)

One of our main focuses these past few days has been that of service. In serveral of our meetings, we've offered to help them with literally anything (within ethical reason), but so far...nothing. WE SHALL PRESS ON, however! Huzzah!

While out and about, we encountered a woman who actually spoke English! And, even cooler, she wanted us to TEACH her IN ENGLISH! The lesson was indeed an immensly powerful, and the Spirit was definetly present. Elder Thibault ironically struggled a bit, as he's taught so much in Spanish, he's not at all accustomed to doing so in English! :D

In other news, another investigator of ours, by the name of Victoria, came to General Conference for one of the sessions! I had to do everthing in my power not to scream for joy. (If any of you have seen "The Best Two Years", I'm essentially Elder Calhoun.)

I want to personally testify that it is through our challenges that The Lord shapes us into someone immensely more amazing and powerful. I've seen this in 7 1/2 weeks in the field; IMAGINE what 2 years will do!

I'm squeezed for time (the computer I'm using is really really slow), and I can't seem to find any other stories off the top of my head, so I suppose I'll bid a fond farewell for now!

Peace out, mis amigos! (Including my MTC friends who are seeing this! I'll try to have a joke of the week sent out for you next week!)
Van con Dios!

-Elder Jones

Change! (But not the kind you keep in a piggybank!)

I know, you've all been having trouble sleeping these past several days because the weekly letter of MK was not delivered on time. It's okay, I cried a little too. (JUST ONE TEAR. AND THEN IT SPLIT INTO TWO PIECES, FELL TO THE EARTH, AND BROUGHT FORTH A BEUATIFUL GARDEN OF SOUR GUMMI WORMS AND CHOW MEIN. TRUE STORY.)

Just a note, all future MK emails shall be reponded to/sent out on Mondays. Your least favorite day is now your favorite day. ;P

Okay! Wow, there's a lot to talk about, and not a lot of time! Wooh...where do I start...*rolls shoulders*

I'm now in my first area, which is known by most as Villa Altagracia (and known by the rest as Disneyland, but no one listens to them). I'll be forthright, the work is challenging. Quite truly, serving a mission is literally the most challenging thing I've ever done in my life. But, as with every trial, there come blessings. I've never slept so well in my life! And I've gained a magnificently deeper relationship with the Lord. I can testify with ever fiber of my being that if we turn to Him in our lowest points, He can and will give us the strength to endure the refiner's fire.

But you're here for storytime! Well, let's see...

I've begun a war that will only end in death. While I am strong, I am greatly outnumbered. Only at my peak will I be able to annhiliate my foes. Yes, I speak of the ants. Our apartment has several (million) ants that enjoy frolicking in our kitchen. Howevewer, I have taken drastic measures to ensure that their civilization ends in ruin. (I put down piles of Corn Meal, which apparently causes their stomachs to explode.) MUHAHAHAHA *cough cough*...

Also, there was a Baptism in our area! A woman by the name of Cinthia had been taught by the missionaries before me for a time, and her baptismal date was set up for just after I arrived. (I'm so awesome at being a missionary, people get baptized without my having to teach them! [Totally kidding. I wish it was easier to detect sarcasm in plain written words.])

Woah! Okay, I am basically out of time. Let's see...funny short notes...

We were out contacting, and went toi start talking to this guy, but he was...umm...*blushes*...urinating when we sent forth our salutations, which was prior unknown to us.
I sampled a Domican "burger", of a sort, known as a "Chimi". (Not to be confused with a "Chimicanga".)

Sleeping under mosquito nets is a new experience, but I've adjusted quickly to it.

I've been making comics! I'll try to send some home when I can.

The past several weeks alone have changed me so much. It's amazing to see what the Lord can do with our lives when we place ourselves in His service! When I get back though, it's going to be weird readjusting...

That's all I can squeeze for now (not referring to hugs, although I do miss those)!

Peace, Love, Unity, Serenity!
Stay well-hydrated, my friends!

-Elder Jones

********
MAILING ADDRESS (will be updated to the right of the blog, under his handsome mug, as often as possible)

Brought forth by popular demand, here it is! The beautiful MKzing Dominican Republic Mailing address! Send all of your papery whatchamajigs here!

Elder McKay Jones
Misión Santo Domingo Oeste
C/ Hatuey #73
URB. Los Cacicazgos, Santo Domingo
Republica Dominicana

The Fifth Week (fifth is such a weird word)!

Sunshine and leprechauns; Elder Jones is back with a snack pack attack!

And thus my fifth (blauh, such a weird word!) week at Hogwarts draws to a close. It's been pretty normal down here; we've really just been more focused on the "mastering" (we're all such gringos) of this beautiful language.

HOWEVER! Before you go closing the page and skip off to enjoy some delicious lime skittles (which I was recently informed no longer exist in this reality [thank you for the notification Haley], so...hmm...), I do INDEED have stories to ramble to thou about!

Approximately six Earth Rolls ago (also known as last Friday), we performed which was known by the tongues of our forefathers as "Splits" (we newbies were paired up with an experienced missionary for the cause of gaining experience in the field). My temporary companion was an Elder with the last name Martin (who almost ironically is planning on going to Utah State as well). To get to his area, we took a "Concho", the Dominican word for a cute little cab in which about four people are stuffed in the backseat, and around two (not including the driver) are popped in the front. The traffic here is akin to the mind of Leonardo Da Vinci: it's absolute madness and insanity, but there's a strange sense of order to it. (I've never before seen a two lane road occupied by four cars side-by-side.) So we bounced off, to a quaint little area called...umm..Ariea. I can't quite recall the name, but it sounded a lot like "Area". Huh. Anyway, so we marched off, so as to fulfill an appointment set the day before, with a member of the church who's floating a bit at the "inactive". While he spoke extremely fast (I understood about 15% of the conversation), his personality was so entertaining and friendly, I found myself laughing even when I'd no idea what had just been said (actually, that's normal for me ;D ).

After the meeting, we slipped down some alleys/side-roads between the buildings to get the the residential areas (think of it like the individual neighborhoods inside a city, except the streets for such are sidewalks that cut past buildings), so as to get to our next appointment. We shared a bit about the Restoration of the fullness of Christ's Church, then left with a prayer. To wrap up the planned part of our schedule, we traversed over to our last appointment, with a woman who my companion had contacted the day before. Unfortunately, she wasn't home, but her husband displayed some interest. SUPER COOL NOTE! While we were praying before the actual lesson, this totally random guy came up and started listening. After we closed with an "Amen", the man asked if he could enter this other guy's house to listen to our message. I talked to Elder Martin about it later, and he said such is not at all uncommon here, as the people are quite a bit more welcoming than we are state-side. TIGHT! (Like a Concho!)

To wrap up our evening of missionary-ing, we returned to the bread and butter (actually, at one point, we literally did have bread and butter; delicious!) of trackting, or, in the words of the ancient times, talking to flipping everybody to see who holds interest! And, much like the University, everybody was really polite about it, even those who weren't at all interested!

As the chapter of the day began to close, we ran into a guy who was from the U.S. (and almost ironically, literally from New York). We didn't really talk much about the gospel (he kept saying that we should apply for ATT while we were down here, as our pasty lack of melanin would somehow grant us a higher chance of being hired [we subsequently explained to him that, in a sense, Missionary work is our full-time job for the next two years {well, without the getting paid part, but still}]), but he did express interest in chatting with us another time. So coolness there!

Afterward in the Epilouge, we popped back in a Concho, and zipped back over to the MTC.
After a bit of a daily wrap up, I crawled back to my room, and passed out.

It's been a sweet but serene week! I was hit in the eye with a paper airplane, and subsequently invented a paper airplane that causes the user to increase in irritation! (No matter how hard you throw it, it flips around after about two feet and smashes into you! Or the ground in front of you!)

And...that's all I got. My simmering pot of story sauce has run dry!

Peace, Love, Unity, Serenity!

-Elder Jones

(And I expect someone to re-invent lime Skittles by the time I get back!)

Este es la semana de cuatro. *DUN DUN DUNNNNN!!!*

*Lightning rains down from the sky, transforming a beautiful patch of roses into a flaming column of glorious glory. From the flames steps a gleaming white figure, his tie twisting like a feathered serpent in the wind. He smiles, and the sun glints off his teeth, then subsequently his name-tag, emblazoned with the title "Elder Jones".*

Hello! It is I! And I'm back with more theatrics than ever before!! Muhahahahaha!

This has been a rather jelly-filled doughnut of a week! So squished have been the events therein, and so sweet has been the time that has held it all together! Let's see...notes, notes, thoughts and things... 

On Friday, it was our intent to pop over to la universidad to speak with the students regarding our message of Christ. ...Note how I said it was our INTENT to. Unfortunately, they'd a bit of a strike over yonder, so the area wasn't exactly hospitable for Momos. Or for anyone, actually. But all is well, for we simply altered the forces of time and changed the university trip to WEDNESDAY!!!

On Tuesday, all of the properly seasoned MTC veterans traversed away to their own areas, peppered and salted to the brim with all of the words and teachings that you can squeeze inside six weeks of language training. (Or perhaps a bit more. MTC TIME TARDIS!!!) It's felt odd and empty without them. Sort of like when you're a senior in high school; all of the upperclassmen before you are suddenly gone, and you realize that it's your turn. Fascinating, really.

Hmm...what else...my companion, Elder Harsh, has acquired what the ancients of old (that's redundant) labeled as "Strep Throat". We gave him a blessing, and he's been doing a bucketload better. Miracles of The Lord!

Also in the regards of aforementioned mentionings, we skipped over to the university yesterday, so as to fulfill that which has been unfulfilled. Because of my companion's less than enjoyable condition, he stayed back with another Elder who's been feeling under the weather likewise. So, to satisfy the demands of justice, the sick Elder's companion, Elder Bell, and I were united in a new Fellowship. The university was glorious (and hot), and basically everyone we talked to (with the exception of a few) seemed legitimately interested in our message, so much that they gave us their information so that "real" missionaries could teach them more. Exciting! (And even the ones that weren't interested were still extremely polite about such. Caribbean Canada!)

Anything else...ooh! Don't tell anyone, but tonight, Santa and Rudolph are going to introduce themselves to the new missionaries. It's Christmas (Preparation Day, the missionary's equivalent of such), so why not? :D

The Lord has given me many experiences these past few weeks, and through struggles He has and continues to refine me into a greater person than I've ever been before. At times it's tough, but I know that through our Lord, Jesus Christ, all things are possible. Woo!

I love you all! Stay classy, and eat your greens! (That includes lettuce, kale, and lime Skittles! 

Paz!
-Elder Jones

The Week of Three (aka, Lots of Rice and Beans. Yum yum yum!)

Konichiwa, all of you Americanos! Tis I, the Lord of Insanity and Flattery! (As in, I flatten things. True story.)

Como estan ustedes?

The Land of la Republica Dominica is fantastic! In fact, just the other day (and by that, I mean a week ago), we left the shroud of the Missionary Training Center for a season to invite others to hear the glorious words of Christ. As our squadron of Momos skipped through the gates roundabout our Center of Training, we belted loose in magnanimous cries of that song "For the First Time in Forever" from the Frozen Soundtrack (focused especially on the part regarding opening up the gate). As we cavorted across the road (narrowly avoiding death [not really, but the drivers here really are worse than Utah drivers]), we breathed deeply and laced our lungs with fantabulastical Dominican air.

Bits and tidbits to share...hmm...I wait for this all week, but then draw a blank as soon as I start typing. Ah! So like I mentioned before, we ventured out into the real world, and popped over to la Universidad, taking in a few more sights of Santo Domingo. And lo, as we arrived, like an eggshell upon pavement our formation of Elders and Hermanas split in every which way, speeding off in packs of two (and on rare instances, three). We spoke in our floppy spanish with the students there, who were indeed insanely polite like had been foretold. Several were interested in our message of the Restored Gospel of Jesus Christ, and those who weren't were nice enough to politely listen.

Hahaha; there was, however, one chap, who Elder Harsh (my companion) and I bore strong testimony to that God lives, and that through his son Jesus Christ, all can be clean from their sins and iniquities. He responded that he didn't believe in Jesus Christ or God...and then there was about a sentence or two that I didn't understand...and something about the supernatural.

Oh, and then a missionary from an Evangelical Church chatted with us for a moment or two. After a bit of trying to discern what he was saying (he spoke insanely rapidly, and with a gigantic slur to boot), we realized he was asking for money. After explaining to him that we were likewise without money, he smiled and walked away. Fun fun!

In other news, the cauldron of my heart has been boiling white-hot for quite at the concept that my shoulder bag lacks the sufficient capability to carry a bottle of water. (Which is extremely important here; dehydration is as easy to come by as dirt in the ground. En serio.) However, when an MK (sorry, Elder Jones) sees a problem, he runs around in a storm wearing a metal suit until a bolt of lightning strikes his gorgeously handsome frame and delivers an idea from above! (And then he waits in the hospital for a couple of weeks until his charred skeleton is repaired enough to execute the aforementioned idea.)

Needless to say, but it shall be said anyway, I summoned my inner McGuiverr! Or McGiaverr! Or MKgiiver! (However that's spelled!)

Like a highly trained assassin, I backflipped off my bed, then cartwheeled to my suitcase. With only a single tear shed, I procured my crappiest pair of socks (clean, mind you), and slit the foot garment in twain. I then snatched up the lower half, and, sacrificing the next five hours for the sake of awesomeness, stitched in onto my bag, bonding the two fabrics to become one whole. INSTA-BOTTLE HOLDER!! 

Also, I discovered my love for sewing. Weirdly brilliant.

Random things...Elder Smith smeared shaving cream on his face, pulled on a red shirt, then subsequently stuffed a pillow under the aforementioned shirt, and then sub-subsequently grabbed his bag of dirty laundry and slung it over his shoulder. I similarly strapped a red-light headlamp to my face, then hung socks from my ears. Together, we were the most terrifying/ghetto Santa and Rudolf EVAR!!! ...And we stopped by another Elder's room at 11PM so as to help him celebrate his birthday. Nothing says birthday better than hillbilly Christmas!

Also, in this line of thinking, I ran down a hallway making chicken noises. ...There's no way to make that sound sane. :D

My ankle has mostly healed, so I've returned to dominating Ultimate Frisbee/Volleyball. Actually, fun story: one of the teachers here is a mega-nerd (Avatar, Naruto, Pokemon; the works), and he "claims" to have access to eight "gates" of power within his body (like chacras). Opening one grants him an insane burst of power, and the more he opens, the more powerful he becomes (but after he used the eighth gate, he dies). For now, the highest he can get is to the fourth gate, as his body isn't strong enough to go any higher. For now. Anyway, Frisbee got intense (try saying that without smiling) and he did something I'd never seen before: HE OPENED THE FOURTH GATE. Normally, he just goes one or two, but four...never before. So intense...and we still lost. :D

*Taps to the rhythm of a Time Lord's heartbeat* That's all I have for now! I grow more powerful every day in Spanish, and soon I shall be able to pass as a native Dominican! Because that's the only thing keeping me from passing as such! ;D

So long, farewell, aviresen adieu! *Double fist pump*

Adios!

Pictures!

Florida coast. He said it looked cool, so he took a picture of it

Oops! Haha! He didn't think to ask to keep it, but he snapped a pic before they took it back.

Selfie!

MTC

MK in a wheelchair (ultimate frisbee champ :) ) and his companion, Elder Harsh

MKzing. 'Nuf said

Hmmmm...No words...

A drawing by one of his teachers. The one MK talked about being an Avatar and Pokemon fan.

They're trying to hold back the crazy that is MK. Ha!

Well, at least he's using his Spanish. There's that.

Elder Jones found his love of money

Elder Jones getting his grub on. Apparently they don't teach manners in the MTC ;)

Rain rain go away...Or come to California!

Santo Domingo Temple